Although the 9 month wait for baby Paisley to make her arrival was long and winded, it was worth the wait. Never at any moment during that 9 months did I think there would be an adjustment going from Mom to Grandma. However, the adjustment hit me hard. Transitioning from mom to grandma, aka Grammy Sparkles, was a difficult transition. I think a lot of the struggle came because I was not aware there would even be a transition.
I decided to share what worked for me to transition to being Grammy Sparkles, in hopes I can help someone. Here are my tips and thoughts on becoming a grandma.
Respect your child’s method of parenting. It never occurred to me that my daughter would make different “kind” of parenting choices than I did. However, parents really do have the right/choice to chose their parenting style. We can be there to offer support and help when asked for it. This was probably the hardest one for me to learn and accept. However, it has brought me such joy to watch my daughter be a mother. My heart swells with such love when I see her being a mom. I know her choices will not always be perfect, but neither were my choices as a mom.
Remembering you are not responsible to make healthcare decisions for your grandchild. Shortly after Paisley was born, she had a couple seizures and ended up in the Helen DeVos Children’s Hospital. It was very scary and hard for me to not jump in and help make decisions in regards to her care. As I was going through this experience I realized my daughter needed me. I began to focus on supporting and helping my daughter so she could have the energy to be a mom and make decisions. I am happy to report, Paisley is home and doing well. I also learned that my daughter is much stronger than I was as a young mom and that makes me so proud.
Love with all your heart. Watching my granddaughter come into this world instantly changed my view. I no longer felt the world was full of sadness and tragedy. I witnessed a beautiful soul enter this world and my heart jumped with joy. The nurse laid Paisley on her mom and the world stood still as I watched the love my daughter has for her daughter. The love was pure and innocent, just as a mothers love should be. I reached up to touch my brand new granddaughter and she grabbed my pinky. My heart changed in that moment. Trivial things no longer mattered. Loving with all my heart will now be my mantra.
Now I can fully enjoy this beautiful spirit. The joy of being Grammy Sparkles, is greater than I could have imagined. I am grateful for this stage in my life and look forward to the many moments on this journey. Hopefully, your journey of being a grandparent will be full of adventure and love!